denmark! back by popular demand!

Fear not, Sweden – while you were busy listening to ABBA, playing Minecraft and NOT going to the World Cup, your brave neighbor – forever tied to you by the Oresundsbridge (in Sweden also known as “The Great Umbilical Cord of Hope”) – has formulated another sensible blog post.

Anyway. Where was I? Ah yes… Recently the Swedish blogger and I discussed the many highs and lows of cooking. Sadly she has been skipping her vegetables and I keep telling her, you’re not really living life – if you can’t even afford a pear. Am I right, Mrs. Lundahl-senior?

So in an attempt to get her off the granola bars and discover the joys of greens, we sat down with two baskets packed with everything Mother Nature has to offer. My mission was to explain all the qualities of these foods.

Dear readers, I know you are rightly thinking “Denmark, what gives you the right to lecture Sweden about food?” – Well, firstly Copenhagen alone has 15 Michelin-starred restaurants, among these is Restaurant Noma. Stockholm has 8. And secondly, have you heard they eat rotten fish? They do! It’s true!

Back to the story! The first basket was called “Canada Vegetables – Deluxe Exotic”.

All it contained was a few parsnips, cabbage, some radish, sweet potatoes, regular potatoes, celery and onions…

Really? Here I am trying to teach about vegetables and this is the selection? And furthermore, seriously… “Deluxe exotic”… ?

Could cabbage really represent the most exotic vegetables on offer? That’s sad. But again, how often is the word “exotic” heard in the same sentence as vegetable? The word is almost exclusively reserved for fruits. I wonder if people in Brazil, a country overflowing with exotic fruit, are truly aware of just how exotic their flora really is?

Anyway, the second basket contained fruit! What a fantastic relief. Sorry vegetables, but you suck. There were some peaches on top of the basket. Peaches! Possibly one of the most delicious fruits ever.  

 

The Swedish blogger asked discretely: where do peaches come from? I of course, took it she wasn’t asking about the Swedish Embassy Dala horse named Peaches. Pictured here with Lena on top:

Where do peaches (fruit) come from?

A just question and to answer that, I am going to let everyone in on a little secret. Everything comes from China. Just look at garlic, ketchup, ginger and everything bought in the IKEA gift-shop (oh snap!). So if the question ever comes up during a pub quiz or Trivial Pursuit, you’ll have an ace in the hole.  You’re welcome.
 

Looking through the rest of the fruit basket, it became clear to me that there were more existential issues related to cooking than explaining it to Sweden.

 

Why is fruit so superior to vegetables? Fruit, in all its glory can be nearly irresistible – that is more than can be said of a kale-smoothie or a peeled carrot.

Try to name one vegetable that trumps fruit? I mentioned ginger earlier. That is the closest I’ve come. That is a pretty decent vegetable.

Well to wrap it up, (I think someone wants their blog back) I thought our Swedish blogger was no better off. However I did notice this!
 

 

Fruit 1 – Vegetables 0.